The outside of a horse is good for the inside of a man . . . or is it?

I’ve spent the weekend at the Equine Affaire in Columbus, Ohio and had the privilege of watching Linda Parelli, Jesse Peters, Mollie Robbins, and Christine Madoni demonstrate horsenalities, personalities, and Game of Contact! Plus, watch many other presenters throughout the weekend covering topics such as natural horsemanship, breed specific demonstrations, dressage, jumping, western performance, massage, etc. During all these amazing demonstrations I couldn’t help but think how amazing, versatile, and athletic the horse is! Not to mention how lucky we as humans are to be involved in their world!

 As I was watching one of the less exuberant presenters my mind began to wonder . . . thinking of all the variety horse’s offer us as well as the room to grow and improve ourselves through the study of the horse. One quote stuck out in my mind as particularly interesting:

“There is something about the outside of a horse is good for the inside of a man.” –Winston Chirchill

Now, normally I really like this quote, but for some reason (perhaps the dominate LBI in myself J, thanks Linda for the humorous reminders this weekend!) I dared to confront this quote with a challenge: The INSIDE of a horse is by far the most valuable for the inside of a man.

After all it is the inside of the horse where the true ‘being’ exists, they are of course beautiful to watch, stunning to observe and fascinating to study. But the true value is Under the sleek, powerful exterior, you have to dig a little deeper find to what makes a horse a horse.

They are amazing partners for us humans, different in so many ways but complimentary in even more. Man is the ultimate predator designed to out strategize its prey. Built to learn, grow and build. Able to remember past experiences learn from them and plan for a different future. Able to build means of communication, science and records that will outlive our short lives. Continually thinking of what has been, what will be, and what could be. Able to overcome incredible odds through faith in something greater then oneself. Nurturing and motivated to maintain strong, and long family ties.

On the flip side, the equine created as the ultimate prey animal. Living in the moment alert to changes in the environment (with foals being able to run in just 2 hours of birth). Able to easily cover 20+ miles a day with rhythm, speed and grace. With the capacity to attack a challenging stallion, fight to the death then within a moment begin grazing calmly with the herd. Built with such a shape that they can accept a human for a comfortable ride on their back and with such a character that they allow it! They are creatures with the dignity of a noble being and yet are unreasonably forgiving. 

What an amazing partnership not because of the similarities but because of the differences. What humans lack horses can provide and often do so willingly.

And for all that they offer and give perhaps the most valuable is the opportunity for us to grow, to discover how to see the world from a different point of view and then how to use our incredibly equipped brains to solve the puzzle of bringing our world views together.

Often at the end of a ‘Horse Behavior & You’ Course we would take the time to say thank you to everyone who had been part of and helped us on our journeys. The last “Thank you” was dedicated to the biggest teacher we could ever have: “Our Horses”, I’d like to second that and say THANK YOU to all the Equines that have helped make us better human beings!

80% of Success is Just Showing Up!

While teaching this month a topic that continues to come up is finding motivation for ourselves. In fact the topic of how to be motivated and how to make progress has been the most dominate after-clinic/lesson discussion between myself and students. Which caused me to lick and chew on the drive home and thinking about the overlay on the horsenality/personality chart. So, here is what I have been thinking about when it comes to motivation/getting started/making progress.

Extroverts have the jump on us introverts when it comes to getting started! The chances of an action-motivated extrovert just doing ‘something’ is greater than an introverts who may feel like they have to have all the information first, then have a plan, and KNOW what’s going to happen before they even start. Well let’s face it, the chances of all of these things lining up, and an introvert feeling motivated, and in the right mood every day from the start of a project to the end is pretty slim! Particularly when we’re talking about a horsemanship journey and did I mention “the journey is lifelong”.

If you find yourself on the introverted side of the Personality model more times than not, I can relate! I relate to the feelings of not having enough information to start, or “well, I really don’t have enough time today”, or “I’ll just wait until tomorrow (and then tomorrow turns into the next day and then next week)” and pretty soon we haven’t started and it’s 2 months later. Now, for some extroverts looking in it may appear as if us introverts are procrastinating, but more than just putting something off, it is uncomfortable for us to start a ‘something’ without having ALL the information. We may be the ones who buy a new camera and before ever pushing a button we have read the entire manual, so that we can find out how everything works before we start snapping shots. On the flip side: some extroverts are likely to take the camera out of the box, push every button on it to see what it does and take at least 100 pictures before the day is over. When asked about what they learned from the manual they are liable to say “What manual, it came with directions?”

Both have their benefits and I can appreciate the advantages of both approaches. The point I am getting at is that the horse’s manual is not nearly as black and white as the camera’s manual. In fact, by comparison (particularly for adults who per Pat Parelli’s definition: Practice making simple things difficult), the horse manual becomes incomplete, unclear, ever changing and never-ending! At closer look the horse manual can seem so overwhelming that often Introverts struggle getting started or making it back to the barn after encountering a problem they haven’t read a solution for. It is such an uncomfortable feeling not knowing what to do and/or not knowing the ‘what if’s?” This uncomfortable feeling can be enough to stop some people in their tracks and hold them back from progress.

The good news is: there can be a light at the end of the tunnel, if we are willing to feel a little more uncomfortable for a little or a lot longer. As introverts we need to embrace the uncomfortable feelings of doing things without knowing all the details, if we hope to progress. The uncomfortable feeling is our brains way of trying to keep us safe (Stephanie Burns has some excellent information, to learn more on this), our brain is doing its job. Just like your horse’s prey animal instincts are doing their job when he spooks at the rustle in the bushes. Sure in principle and while sitting comfortably reading, ‘Embrace the uncomfortable’ sounds like a great idea, but in practice it may not ‘feel good’ and often looks odd as we’re trying to figure things out. However, if we are EVER going to make progress we have to just get out there and do it. Now, let me be clear, I’m not suggesting that you go out to the barn and pull off your bridle, hop on without a saddle and see how things go, what I AM suggesting is that you actually GO to the barn. To get started, a strategy that can be successful is to schedule time to be with your horse and GO. Even if you’re not ‘in the mood’ to play, go anyway. Sit with your horse or groom them or sit on the other side of the fence and watch your horse. After all you are more likely to eventually play with your horse if he is at fingers distance than if he’s 10 miles down the road or even ‘all the way’ out in the backyard. In order to make progress you must make the time with your horse a priority. It is your time to do what YOU need with your horse, even if that means sitting next to him and talking about your challenging day at work/school or standing next to him and smelling the one and only smell that is YOUR horse (it’s the same smell that our non-horsey friends think is ‘stinky’, but those of us who have a love for horses - we know it is the BEST smell in the world :-). In fact by just showing up, you are already 80% down the road of success! So, when life starts to get in the way of your horsemanship and threatens to stop your progress in its tracks, remember 80% of success is just showing up, so GO!

Tips on making horsemanship progress even in the winter!

Making the best of the winter weather and getting a chance to play with your horse can seem like a challenge at times, particularly for those of us who live anywhere that gets below freezing! If you’re someone who likes to keep feeling in your toes and appreciates a normal colored nose vs. your nose’s best impression of Rudolph, it can seem hard to get motivated to keep up with your New Year goals and go out to play with your horse! Well, I feel your pain! When it takes 10 minutes to bundle up, 10 minutes to de-bundle your horse, and by the time you’ve groomed and are ready to play you’ve lost feeling in your fingers, it can seem like a far reach to practice your refinement under 6 layers.

I have to say Quick and I have experienced the same thing. So with all the extra time sitting in front of the heater to warm up I came up with a plan to stay on track even when the weather doesn’t seem like the most willing partner. I realized that during my daily horse chores I can add in a little progress. For example, I need to bring Quick from the pasture up to the barn for grain and Parelli Essentials J, well Pat says there are only 7 games in 5 zones so why not make the walk from zone 5 (after all my one rein driving could use a little more straightness) and when we come across a puddle or mud patch I can use my body language to turn him on the way to the barn, it’s working as a great point to point to help his straightness! Then I take an extra 2 minutes and just before I grain him we play with the clippers, what a great way to set up a positive pattern – put up with the vibrating clippers and then get something you love – grain! And as you can imagine we have to go back to the pasture (good draw) so I can practice two things that could always be better backwards and sideways “The better your horse goes backwards and sideways the they do everything else”, so we play a little ‘Rockslide’ on the way back to the pasture.

I vary the routine slightly but at least this way I get some progress time in with him even on the days that are below freezing and we get a chance to stay connected during the challenging winter months. I hope this helps inspire some ideas on how you could make the best of the time with your horse even if it is limited. Stay warm ad have a progressive winter!

Balancing Principles, Purpose and Timelines

   First, I have to warn you that by no means have I balanced these three! However, they have been on the top of my mind lately and have caused me to lick and chew a TON. The clever side of my brain quickly came up with a solution: If there were only two I would be fine - perhaps I should bring this to Pat's attention and get him to change the saying :-) Take Principles and Timelines for instance, perfect, no problem, set a goal and reach it with the dignity of the horse foremost. Now take Principles and Purpose, "great" take all the time it takes, no pressure, perfect. But combine Purpose and Timelines and out comes the 'predator', the direct line thinker. All of the sudden it becomes easy to forget there is a third, Principles. On the flip side I might remember there is a third and get stuck in a paralysis of analysis trying to figure out how to stay on timeline while sticking to the principles with the prupose shouting lous and clear. WOWSER
   So, as I said, I haven't mastered it but it is something that is becoming increasingly important to me as I think about heading back into competition. Since I began Parelli I have steered clear of the competition ring (knowing what I was like before), and things have been relatively stress free (after my Parelli levels strings, of course :-). But now I'm trying to put the timeline piece back in and I find if I'm not 'beating myself up' for putting my goal ahead of my principle then I'm doing nothing and becoming ineffective in an effort to keep my principles ahead of my purpose! ARGH!
   Complicated! At times I think "wouldn't it be better for my horse if I just took what is now the easy road for me and stuck to just practicing principles?", but then I'm reminded of Pat asking us how interesting it is to say the alphebet? At first, it's great, the best song in the world!! When you first learn it you go around singing to anyone who will listen (often to yourself, but 'who really cares at this stage?'). Then it gets a little boring. What becomes exciting next (depending on your teacher, I suppose) is how to put the letters together to make words, then sentences, then stories and so on. Well, so is the horsemanship journey. I could happily sit at my current level of skills and knowledge with perfect peace and comfort for a LONG time (I'm an introvert by nature, so it would take some time before I was bored enough to decide to make a change), however my horses are already bored!! Pat says horses learn up to 7x faster then humans! Can you believe that? By just showing up we're already behind! With this in mind I started looking predicatably to my extrovert some time ago, and HE is ready for me to step up my game, NOW! So, as is often the case in horsemanship I find myself attempting to stretch myself because my horses need me to. Yes I'll reap the benefits as well, but this is only a secondary focus. My horses need me to get uncomfortable, they need me to push my comfort zone and figure out how to stretch it so that I can push it again.
   As much as my human nature may cause me to 'beat myself up' after an imperfect day, my horses need me to 'get over myself' and keep pushing forward. They need me to learn from my mistakes, after all, Linda says "they're only mistakes if you already know better, so as a student you can't make a mistake". What a powerful concept to truely understand! (leave it to Linda :-).As I journey into this world of combining all the information I've learned, Pat's horsemanship Principles, my Purpose, and the shows Timelines I need to learn a valuable skill, the ability to FORGIVE myself, learn from what's happened and be the best I can be TODAY. It's a new part of my journey and one that I am truely excited about learning from!!